For some reason Christians feel putting up with manipulation is walking in love. Is it?
Yes the scriptures command us to be patient with those that apposes us. To patiently guide them with biblical knowledge and revelation understanding.
In humility correcting those who are in opposition, if God perhaps will grant them repentance, so that they may know the truth— 2 Timothy 2:25.
This is part of our mantra of ministry— “Getting people rooted and grounded in the Word of God”.
We go privately first, unfortunately this is not the protocol we see in the church, the person talks to everyone but the individual first. So, by the time the individual learns of it they are now ostracized from that fellowship because they are contaminated in the eyes others who gossiped and judged. The only option for that individual is to go find another church without the faith critical mass of public, embarrassment and rumors a spiritual force of judgement, they will not grow or fulfill their Gifts & Callings at the gossip filled church.
Jesus instructed that if someone sins against you, you should confront them privately ALONE, without gossiping to a bunch other pseudo-intercessory prayer warriors. This prevents public embarrassment and rumors.
“Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother — Matthew 18:15 NKJV.
We are commanded to Restore with Gentleness: Paul wrote that when addressing someone caught in a trespass, believers should restore that person in a spirit of gentleness, while being mindful of their own temptations. SEE Galatians 6:1.
The New Testament commands us to check our own hearts: Jesus warned against hypocritical hypocrisy bitterness. Before pointing out a flaw in someone else, a person should first evaluate and correct their own shortcomings and motives to correct. Review this warning in
“Judge[condemn] not, that you be not judged. For with what [Condemnation] judgment you judge[condemn], you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye — Matthew 7:1–5 NKJV.
The New Testament commands us to correct with patience: Paul advised Timothy to correct our opponents with patience and teaching the biblical way of doing and being, hoping that God may grant them repentance. And a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient, in humility correcting those who are in opposition, if God perhaps will grant them repentance, so that they may know the truth — 2 Timothy 2:24–25.
The New Testament commands us to speak the Truth in Love: Believers are encouraged to “speak the truth in love”, building up the Body of Christ rather than tearing it down but, speaking the truth in love, causes growth to take place in us— growth into the Head which is Jesus— Ephesians 4:15 NKJV.
Now we can get to the point of this entry— DO WE PUT UP WITH MANIPULATORS. The answer is no. You see the Bible has this sensibility in both the Old and New Testament— suffer NOT sin on thy Brother.
Thou shalt not hate thy brother in thine heart: thou shalt in any wise rebuke thy neighbour, and not suffer sin upon him.
Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the Lord— Leviticus 19:17-18. And behold its New Testament equivalent which just so happens to be the New Covenant Commandment—
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another — John 13:34 NKJV.
… AS I LOVED YOU! Key point along side that this is love one another— this we are talking about fellowship love. This kind of love that the Lord Jesus Christ commands is not the kind we give to the lost. No, it’s the kind of biblical love we love ourselves with. AND WE LOVE OURSELVES WITH THE TRUTH.